Inpotence and dating
We’ve had the usual ups and downs including a huge mortgage and bills; each week is a struggle financially, but that is not the real issue.We are managing and our private school educated kids have never gone without, so I don’t want to focus on the money issue. Our issue can be summed up in one three-letter word: SEX.It’s not just men over 50 who have erection problems. Often erectile challenges crop up quite early in a sexual relationship when folks are just beginning to find their sexual rhythms together.Many guys are nervous that their performance is not up to par – they may require a few weeks or even months to find their groove.Our story is quite suburban and normal (whatever that means).We have been married 15 years (we have two kids, who are teenagers), a dog and cat.At least 10 years ago, when our son was about two, would be the last time.Please believe me when I say I have tried many many things - talking, turning him on, weekend’s away, Viagra, etc.
Many of the men I work with are concerned about their system crashing when their pants are off!
Viagra produced the requisite hard-ons but was no help at all when this couple couldn’t laugh together or let go of their attachment to having things go a certain way between the sheets. Many couples require some help deepening their intimacy, and therapy can provide the tools. The preceding article was solely written by the author named above.
Joannides again: “When it comes to making love, relationship issues trump d*** issues.” © Copyright 2011 by Jill Denton, LMFT, CSAT, CCS, therapist in Los Osos, California. Any views and opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by Good
In this kind of situation I usually sit down with both people separately as well as seeing them together. When you eliminate one leg the stool often topples.
His fiancée had been blaming herself, “He obviously doesn’t find me attractive any more. Once I helped her to realize that his erection problems had nothing to do with her, it turned out that she wasn’t nearly as attached to a hard penis as he had imagined.
You see, my husband, who is a blokey-bloke, hasn’t had a full or proper erection for three years.